New Moon

Help manifest my dreams, time for some new moon ritual. Time to do the homeopathic remedies. Time to remember my own power and strengths. Time to continue my healing.

Black Moon

Traditionally, Black Moon’s are ultra feminine and represent a time of great awakening and clarity. Black Moon’s are extremely powerful and often indicate a sharp turning point in a cycle.
New Moon’s are all about releasing and letting go so the new can emerge. On a New Moon, it is often a good time to go within and spend some time clearing through your subconscious mind.
The New Moon often represents the planting of a seed, and the darkness that seed experiences before it begins to bloom.

Cut and Paste from Medium

• From Recently, I’ve been using gratitude to rewrite stories that no longer serve me. by Jeffrey Field

  
  

  We don’t ignore problems (I prefer to call them incidences with mistaken identities). We just know they’re one story out of an infinite number of stories.
• From Recently, I’ve been using gratitude to rewrite stories that no longer serve me. by Jeffrey Field

  
  

  Because remember, whatever is happening now is only one superimposition in the quantum field. We can collapse that wave with our attention, turn it into a festering problem or we can remember there are a gazillion other possibilities. Possibilities that we can call in with seeds of gratitude.
• From Recently, I’ve been using gratitude to rewrite stories that no longer serve me. by Jeffrey Field

  
  

  …leep and worry about all those “bad things” that supposedly happen when you don’t get adequate Z’s, I plant a seed of gratitude. For what’s to come. For what’s possible.
   
  
  Indigenous Time Keeping - 13 Moons

There is no such thing as a 'black moon' or a 'blue moon' in one month. Indigenous people's worked with the natural rhythms of time in a balanced relationship with the Earth, Moon, and Sun. There is an natural accuracy in time keeping when working with the lunar cycles, 28 days in one Full Moon cycle and therefore only one New Moon within that same cycle.

When we are working with the natural balance of nature, our ecological system, the turtle teaching gives an excellent example of how this is conducted. As seen on an actual turtle's back, there are 13 plates on top and then there 28 platelets around the outside of the shell. Now you see, this is a super natural time keeping method and it is precise with all natural rhythms. Powerful.

out on the ledge

I feel out on the ledge and that I am talking myself in so as not to end my life. I am overwhelmed by anxiety. My immediate response to almost anything is that something bad is going to happen. Something very bad.  And it is my fault.  I feel unappreciated at work and find the work only minimally rewarding.  I feel trapped by my need for income and health insurance due to the diabetes and, high blood pressure, weight issues and PTSD. I feel misunderstood and unaccepted despite the many friends and family who love me, and believe in me.

The other side of that is I can do this. Don't quit. Meditate. Take your meds. Eat healthy. Exercise. Pull yourself up and out of this. You have resilience to it.

But it is never that easy.

don't quit

If I can remember, and feel confident and practice this, I will be better for it.

let it go

1. To give permission or opportunity to; allow:

vulnerability
openness
try another way 
less fear
patience
less anger
pauses

trying to live differently
support positive thoughts
encourage and cultivate calm

it works

letting go
just let that go
everything is okay
nothing bad is going to happen

whats goin on

7 years

7 years is a long time.

7 years ago Asa was killed in a car crash. He was 7 and would now be 14. We gathered and grieved and celebrated his short and remarkable life. We continue to remember, celebrate and grieve. 

Kate has organized an apple picking day for tomorrow. She has gathered the children together and they are trekking out to the apple farm to go apple picking, because Asa loved apple picking.  I'll be here, creating ritual to remember Asa.

beautiful day

Beautiful day.

I feel good because of all the fun I had at home rearranging furniture, and cleaning at a zen level. Fun. I have such fun doing that. I don't know if my mother loved it but she did it as well. I would come home from school and the house would be in disarray and the furniture all moved into new positions.

I cleaned my diffuser. I cleaned it so hard I broke it and need a new one.  I washed the shower curtain, I bleached the bottom of the shower, I cleaned out the cabinet under the sink and found the source of the leak, I got rid of my bedroom clutter and so on and so on. Oh and I might be buying a used desk tonight that I found on Craig's list.

And not one time during that entire day did I feel traumatized or angry or afraid. I just felt good.

And to not have those thoughts and feelings and enjoy what I am doing in the moment is FUN for me.

And today when I woke up I got pleasure from the new layout of the furniture, and it very well may be my new favorite. I feel that I was very productive yesterday and I like the results.

Then this morning when I stepped outside it was a beautiful day. Perfect weather.