that was a short week at work....nice... and today i have lunch with my friend and i have the liberty of the weekend all to myself. sigh of relief.
snow flurries coming. like that too. makes everything so quiet.
the reorg at house continues. I have made a good dent. finished closet this morning. Lazy susan may be next, or bathroom drawers. Then I get to start on the basement stuff. That work is more emotional. various emotional attachments to many of those items. what to keep and what to let go of...it is a letting go process. and then sentimental feelings present resistance to letting go. i keep seeing images of myself as an old woman alone looking at old letters and other items and it being my memory and my solace for living to long, having mementos to remember the good times. will i forget those people and times if i do no have the trinket to release the memory to me? and there is the guilt of what do i keep for my daughter who of course wants the same thing...
i went to work yesterday and it was good to be with people, it always lifts me. why can i not remember that when i am isolating? or maybe i only like hope of being connected, having the opportunity to connect with people. that is the happy feeling i get interacting with strangers. so easy to be really nice to people you do not know. you know the cash register clerk at the store, the deli gal, the folks who repaired my watch saving me $, the servers at my favorite restaurant, the driver i let in the traffic lane, the shopper and their cart that i give wide berth to in the too skinny aisle, the librarian, nurses, med techs, all these folks you see once ... you have a perfect exchange...nothing bad happened....people think oh she is so nice....when really I am just so grateful for the connection and the safety of the moment where nothing bad happens.
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