pause

I have been taking an online course with Pema Choden. It has been good for me to start my day with Pema. I have been more motivated and less stressed since I began the course.

Did a sound healing with GB. Beautiful experience.  Bounty of sound and love. I felt safe and was able miraculously to keep my eyes closed for 45 minutes and be very awake but inside myself with just the sound. It was a healing experience to feel safe all that time.

Saw doc W and got a good report that sugars are lower. It is important to me that she never gives up on me. Doing  kidney sonogram tomorrow, and urine collection this weekend. Crazy. I'm concerned but telling myself not to worry yet.

Back in PT with B.  Tendinitis in my shoulder. Result of driving with right hand/arm only, mouse at work, and plucking chin hairs. Shaving now.

Forgot to pause on the way to PT. Couldn't find it and being lost or rather not knowing where I am going..exactly where..is a hook for me. And I did not pause, I didn't get too worked up but I was very stressed in the car.

Back at the gym. 5 days last week. New work schedule 7-3 is helpful in getting me to the gym. Less stressful at 3. Feels good to be back at the gym.

did a big house clean this weekend. the place looks good. got it clean in time for the cleaning lady coming today to give me an estimate on a heavy clean. because shoulder is limiting my strength right now...I need help with the hard stuff.

Bflo trip home, the first weekend was hard, I was stressed while there and sad when I got home. I couldn't figure out what it was...Robbie was very ill, A and R are fighting, there was the drunk guy at A's bday dinner, Kate and I got into it. Got hooked by Kate, left, was really stressed, the reigned it in and called her and talked to her. All good.Then there was Ron's show. Nostalgic, room filled w people who know me as an artist. Kate looked around and said these are our people. Maybe it was all that.

Learned in absence from Dalton

Life is fluid and will change, and reminding  I got through an episode I may have saved for Dalton before we moved to every two weeks.

Learned that I can handle two weeks which is strength building.

and something I haven't talked to Dalton about Laura...Jen..and how I feel around Laura and the if only she knew stuff.